Part 13: The Hanoi Two-Step

Surviving these Vietnam Streets

Feb 24, 2025

Why’d the chicken cross the road?
Beep Beep
Coffee Culture
Let’s get this bread
Uncle Ho
Food Tours and Birdwatching Lessons

Cold Intro: Dirty Dancing

Dancing is a form of communication that transcends language. Travel the world, and you’ll find that most countries not only have a national language but also national dance styles. Flamenco in Spain, the salsa in Cuba, the waltz in Austria, and the Milly Rock in New York, to name a few.

Within a few minutes of stepping foot in Vietnam, you have to learn theirs.

But this is not your traditional dance. It is very fast-paced - there is no time for signals. You have to rely on non-verbal communication. Footwork is vital. A single misstep could be costly.

Believe it or not, it’s dangerous. The stakes are high. Bodily harm can happen if you don’t pay attention. It’s simultaneously scary and exciting and absolutely vital to learn if you’re going to spend any time in Vietnam.

But what’s the biggest difference between this dance and dances you’ve seen in the past? You have dozens of partners. Also, they’re all riding motorcycles. The name of the dance: crossing the street.

Okay, so maybe it’s not technically a dance, but you get the point.

There are 10 million people that live in Hanoi. There are also 6 million motorbikes. They’re everywhere. The ubiquity of these bipedal vehicles combined with the utter absence of any traffic law creates a street dynamic that is annoying, stressful, and thrilling.

The second I got out of the bus from the airport in the Old Quarters of Hanoi, I was playing real Crossy Road (or Frogger if you’re a little older). The streets are narrow, rarely big enough for two cars, and they are also incredibly loud. Bikers and cars have a form of communication using their horns, where they honk anytime they approach an intersection to warn people of their imminent arrival.

To add another flair to the situation, almost every pedestrian is walking on the shoulders of the road or just in the middle of the road. Why is that you ask? There are SIX MILLION motorcycles in this city, they need a place to park them all. That place is the sidewalk.

The sidewalks have been sacrificed for the bikes, so we civilians are joining the party on the street. It takes patience and a quick burst of speed, but my American roots taught me how to jaywalk at a young age. Once you get the hang of things, navigating through the streets and traffic becomes continuous. You get a feel for it and become part of the flow of the masses. Luckily, pedestrians don’t want to get hit by bikes/cars, and bikes/cars don’t want to hit pedestrians.

Monday - February 17th, 2025

I got my first taste of Hanoi’s chaos on the bus from the airport. I could see out the window people on bikes going opposite the flow of traffic. This was not going to be like Hong Kong or Tokyo.

Dollars go a lot further in Vietnam than they do in Japan, Korea, or at home. This is noticeable by the number of Westerners walking around in their 20s-30s. If you’re looking to travel to a place where you can save a buck, Southeast Asia seems to be a good option.

I also took advantage of this and splurged on a hotel room for the first part of my stay here. Generally, I’ve been spending $20-30 per night in hostels up to this point. I was able to book a real (not like Beppu) hotel (!!) for around $35-40 a night.

When I booked the spot, did I realize that the honking on the street doesn’t take a break when I go to bed? Or that the hotel was also right next to a popular nightlife street? Or that people blast ads out of speakers riding around on bikes at all hours of the day? Maybe not. But I did not care. I had my own space, clean sheets, and bathroom. Luxury.

As is tradition, after dropping the bags off at the hotel, it’s time to hit the streets for our first meal. It didn’t take much walking around to come to the conclusion: there’s something about Hanoi that is just intoxicating. It’s almost like there’s something in there.

Actually, yes. There is something in the air. And it is intoxicating. It’s pollution. Hanoi was ranked as the most polluted city in the world recently. I know that there are many metrics for this and I do have a hard time believing this was the most polluted based on stories I’ve heard of India, but you could tell what was going into the lungs wasn’t great.

Walking around Old Quarters, I started taking in the sights, sounds, and smog. For a moment I passed a group smoking cigarettes at a corner cafe, improving the air quality for a fleeting moment.

Overwhelmed by the cafes, shops, and vendors on the streets, I stopped at a smoothie shop and got a mango smoothie. I sat on a lawn chair on an intersection of a busy corner observing the traffic next to an Aussie named Austin. Austin was trapped in a conundrum. In Vietnam, you have an E-visa that lets you enter the country once. He had a business meeting in a few days in Cambodia about starting a potential hostel with a group over there. He also had a love interest there in Hanoi that he’d met earlier in Laos that he wanted to spend time with before he had to go home. Chase the business and potential money, but not be able to come back to Vietnam for the girl? Or follow the heart and live in the moment and miss out on an opportunity? Austin and I pondered this, talked over our respective trips, and sipped smoothies.

After smoothies, I said bye to Austin forever then went in for some snail soup. For those of you unaware, my favorite author is Anthony Bourdain. He’s a former cook who came to fame by writing his story before turning into a travel food television star. Bourdain traveled all over the world, but his favorite place he writes about is Vietnam. Naturally, I scoured the internet looking for the places he ate and found our snail soup joint (also called bun oc, in Vietnamese).

The joint is a typical Vietnamese street spot. Small plastic stools to sit in that are maybe 6 inches off the floor. A restaurant that consists of a small room that could second as a garage. A woman whipping up bowls in a giant cauldron in the front. More stools and mini tables spilling out onto the sidewalk.

The dish itself is a big bowl of pho-like broth with rice noodles and snails three ways: big snails, small snails, and what appeared to be snail meatballs. Consume with some fresh greens and a few scoops of garlic chili vinegar. If you can get past the snail parts of the meal - delicious.

I wondered the streets of Old Quarters a little longer. I got a coconut and probably looked like a mega-tourist walking around with it. I didn’t mind, this rocked. I did in fact begin to start feeling Hanoi’s intoxicating nature. Feeling a little light-headed and slowly falling further into the labyrinth of Old Quarters I google mapped my way back to the hostel for some rest.

For dinner, I met up with my good old travel bud, Zach. We’re so back.

For dinner, we went to a spot that specialized in bun cha, a grilled pork and noodles dish. What makes the spot we went to more significant is it was the location where Anthony Bourdain ate with, then-president, Barack Obama. Zach and I randomly ended up sitting next to the table the two had dined at and sat next to two older gentlemen named John and Jean (both pronounced John) who were actually from Palo Alto and went to Gunn High School. Jean moved to Vietnam in 2016 and John was paying him a visit. Jean helped us order the goods and we had a great meal chatting up with my fellow Californias over some great food. Jean gave us some words of wisdom on his perspective on happiness and life in Hanoi versus back at home.

Tuesday - February 18th, 2025

Vietnam’s cafe culture is unbeatable. Probably partly inspired by its French colonial days, there are cafes all over the place. You’d be hard-pressed to find a block with no coffee available. I am a big coffee drinker. Vietnam has opened my eyes to what’s possible with coffee. First, their coffee is stronger than our average cup and has a very strong flavor. Second, they are working with combinations that I’d never even heard of - coconut coffee, salt coffee, egg coffee, Vietnamese coffee, black/brown/white coffee, and more. I’ve tried them all and none of them disappoint (no not even egg coffee).

My average mornings here (pictures included below) tend to consist of me cafe hopping and trying different coffees along with the occasional smoothie or pastry. The mornings are slow. The bikes are already honking, but the full fury of the traffic hasn’t kicked in yet.

Elite mornings of coffee, carbs, and smoothies

Back on Tuesday, I went for a morning walk around Hoan Kiem Lake, which is right between Old Quarters and its southern neighbor, French Quarters. I found a woman selling what seemed to be bread and jam/butter on the street so I asked how much for one. She said 5. I assumed this meant 5,000 dong. I checked my wallet and only had a 10,000 bill, so I handed it to her and asked, “Change?”. She said, “Two”. Ahhh, I must’ve misheard her, it’s 20k per loaf. I reach and get her another 10,000 bill. She takes the cash, turns around, and hands me a bag with four loaves.

Yup, I’m dumb. She said “Two?” as a question because she didn’t understand when I said, “Change”. Now I have four loaves of bread and not enough energy to explain the miscommunication and try to return 3 loaves of bread. Oh well. Learning experiences! Unfortunately, the bread was delicious and I ate more than I should have on my walk around the lake.

At night, I met up with Zach and we went to a traditional Vietnamese water puppet show. Not as similar to the Muppets as I had expected, but it was pretty impressive. As you can see in the picture below, there’s a giant pool of water in the front of the stage and people control the puppets from underneath the water in the back. During the show, they tell a handful of traditional folk stories about the history of Vietnam. The part that I enjoyed was they had a band playing traditional Vietnamese music in the background. Not songs I’d have saved on Spotify, but it’s cool seeing what different instruments variations different cultures use.

Wednesday - February 19th, 2025

Woke up early. The street’s noise starts back up around 5 am, so my room on the street is not quite forgiving. The morning was another day of coffee and smoothies. Walks around the lake. I’m liking this routine.

I walked to the Ho Chi Minh Mausoleum in the afternoon, escaping the craziness of Old Quarters for a time. The other parts of Hanoi are still somewhat chaotic, but the relief from the apex of the action in Old Quarters was very welcome. Ho Chi Minh’s Mausoleum? Looks exactly what you’d imagine when you hear the word mausoleum.

mau·so·le·um (noun): a building, especially a large and stately one, housing a tomb or tombs.

The mausoleum was located in a park area along with the Ho Chi Minh Museum, the Presidential Palace, and Ho Chi Minh’s old residence. The park is right next door to Vietnam’s National Assembly Building (Hanoi is the capital). I did walk-through tours of the museum and Uncle Ho’s former residence when they opened. Both were fairly interesting. I particularly enjoyed the style of Ho Chi Minh’s old home. For all the faults of colonialism, one thing that they did nail was the architecture. Noticed this in Hong Kong too. Beautiful buildings.

In the night, Zach and I did a food tour in the Old Quarters. I can’t recall all the meals we had but it was a feast. More Bun Cha, Banh Mi with pate, fried pork, broth-less pho, shrimp dumplings, coconut ice cream with mango, and a creme brulee egg coffee to cap the night off. Highlights listed below.